It was back to cup action for Chesterfield’s 3rd XI, with the competition still in its early stages and very much resembling the Champions League league phase. The standard of football… sorry, hockey… was certainly comparable, although the players were unfortunately operating without the eye-watering paychecks. The Galácticos of Derbyshire welcomed the Pride of Lincolnshire for what turned out to be a comfortable victory on a sunny but decidedly chilly day.

Chesterfield started brightly, putting Lindum under considerable pressure and creating enough chances in the opening exchanges to have the game wrapped up before the opposition had properly settled. Unfortunately, finishing proved to be something of an optional extra.

The breakthrough finally came courtesy of a generous contribution from the Lindum defence, whose attempted pass found its way straight to Dan McCollum. Presented with the opportunity, Dan made no mistake, dispatching the ball emphatically into the roof of the net. A gift gratefully received and dispatched with the efficiency of a seasoned European striker.

Dan nearly doubled his tally shortly afterwards with a ferocious strike that rattled the crossbar. The ball eventually found its way out for a sideline hit, leaving Lindum relieved and Chesterfield wondering what might have been.

The second goal arrived through a penalty corner, with David McCormick providing the finishing touch to give Chesterfield a deserved 2–0 advantage. The scoreline was comfortable, if not entirely representative of the hosts’ dominance, with Charlie Nixon emerging as the chief architect of several missed opportunities. Some of his efforts were so spectacularly wayward that even artificial intelligence would have struggled to generate a convincing explanation. To his credit, Charlie never stopped trying, demonstrating admirable perseverance in the face of mounting evidence that the goalposts were actively avoiding him.

At half-time, the captain delivered a timely reminder that the best way to see the game out was to keep passing the ball, move it intelligently and make Lindum work hard. Sensible advice, and one that would hopefully reduce the number of opportunities for the opposition to enjoy any further generosity from the Chesterfield forwards.

The second half followed much the same pattern as the first, with Chesterfield continuing to create chances and Lindum doing their best to keep the score respectable. Eventually, the third goal arrived when Ellis Lammings unleashed a shot from outside the circle. Oliver Goodear got the decisive deflection, guiding the ball beyond the goalkeeper to put the result beyond any lingering doubt.

At this point, the entertainment extended beyond the players. The umpires could be heard over their headsets taking issue with one another over the interpretation of the advantage rule. The discussion evidently remained unresolved, with one official later heard in the bar offering the reassuring admission: “I don't profess to know the rules.” A refreshingly honest contribution to the post-match analysis, if nothing else.

The final whistle confirmed a comfortable 3–0 victory for Chesterfield, a clean sheet and safe passage through another round of cup action. The only real disappointment was that the scoreline failed to reflect the volume of chances created. On another day, this could easily have been five or six, although Charlie Nixon may wish to disagree with the statistical evidence.

There were plenty of positives to take from the performance, not least the debut of young goalkeeper Theo Colton, who produced an assured display to keep a clean sheet.

The Men of the Match awards went jointly to brothers Aqeel and Ali, whose performances were nothing short of Raza sharp. A fitting reward for two players who helped ensure Chesterfield remained firmly in control throughout.

And so, another cup tie negotiated, another clean sheet secured, and the Galácticos of Derbyshire march onwards. The players could look forward to the traditional post-match refreshments at the Anchor, where the biggest challenge of the day was still to come.

Six brave souls returned to tackle the 30 portions of teas awaiting them. While Chesterfield had made relatively light work of Lindum, the prospect of consuming five portions each presented a far sterner test of endurance. The final result of that particular contest remains unconfirmed, although it is fair to say that the Anchor's kitchen had delivered a performance worthy of Champions League recognition.

Final score: Chesterfield 3–0 Lindum 5th XI.

Three goals, a clean sheet, a cup victory and enough missed chances to keep the club’s AI department busy for weeks. Onwards and upwards, Chesterfield!